History may repeat itself often however I do not think that you are destined to repeat a past of your own, or a past of your family's just because you are in fact a "product" of your past. Acclaimed to like, five hundred people is a quote that "we are the sum of all the moments of our lives". Okay not really because Thomas Wolfe wrote this in Look Homeward Angel and he is the only one who receives credit for this quote which just happens to have been repeated since by five hundred people.
I don't think you are destined... to anything you haven't made your mind up to do, because you alone are the determining factor & the best way to predict the future is to create it for yourself.
We sit in hundreds of backyards in a lifetime, restaurants on the other side of town, with old friends, drinking wine.... and we spend most of that time toying with the past and reminiscing about this and that and how it just wasn't the right time or wasn't meant to be. I'm starting to feel it's the easy way out.
I don't want to be held down. So much so that I've spent the last several years avoiding any kind of real commitment. Sure, I bought a car, I took a new job, I found a place of my own... these are all commitments but they are "me commitments". Nothing that could ever presumably hurt or affect another person in any way. I've spent the last couple of years thinking that if you are holding a hand it's holding you down, and that you're never going to experience the things you are supposed to on your own, and in your "young adult life"-but I have gradually changed what I wanted out of life.
I changed what I wanted out of life. That sounds nice, but what I'm getting at is that the people in our lives are all that really matter, the relationships you have in life. The friends, lovers, teachers, mentors, bosses... all these relationships teach you a lot about yourself and whether your realize it or not, whether I've realized it or not, I've been holding somebody's hand this whole time.
Hold a hand that brings you to life.
